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2012-05-15

讓我讀懂妳的愛

愛壹個人好難。當妳死去活來地認定自己愛上壹個人的時候,卻不知道對方的心在何處。這份愛的代價也確實太大。不是在自己眼中把對方迷失,就是把自己丟失。

什麽是愛?愛是喜歡,萺腄涼轵是迷戀、是魂牽夢萦;愛是心悅,是滿足,是暢快淋漓;愛是交融,就珍重,是心心相印。http://www.goldecb.com/investment.html

當妳喜歡壹個人,對他有傾心、有沖動,有思念、有挂牽,甚至是迷戀的時候,其實與他本人是沒有關系的。有時候,我們對壹個人的愛戀會讓自己感到幸福,“當壹顆心有所托付時,對這顆心是壹種滿足。”然而,這只是妳個人的幸福,與他無關。

提升妳的幸福,就是要把妳的愛戀讓他知曉,讓他感受,讓他讀懂,讓他接受。而這個過程正是妳常常會幸福地痛,或痛並快樂著。

這個過程,有時會因爲有心與心的撞擊火焰變得很短,也會由于感情的不可琢磨而變得很長。他可以感受妳的“愛”,但未必讀懂妳的“愛”。

以肢體語言爲例,對方擁抱的強烈程度,可傳遞動作輕重的信息。更確切地說,當妻子擁抱妳更緊時,或者她身體更貼近妳時,表示她需要妳更強的刺激,當她緩緩推開妳時,妳應該想到是不是自己動作重了些。

當然,夫妻之間還可以預先規定好傳遞性感受的暗號,可以用目光,更多的是用手勢,比如說,雙方可以手掌相貼,根據對方在掌心上用力的大小,來調整性行爲的姿勢和幅度。

專家認爲,由于女性天性中的溫情和細膩,在日常兩性中的表達基本比較含蓄和朦胧,初爲人夫的男子可能會忽視到這些。因此,需要學會讀懂對方的肢體語言。

有例爲證,張男和孫女經別人介紹交往了半年便結婚入洞房,婚後兩周,男方便覺得女方不可捉摸:“她想幹什麽從來不跟我說,老是板著臉讓我猜,我哪有那麽大的本事,現在都是夫妻了,還有什麽不好說的呢?”心理學專家研究表明,兩個人在面對面交往時,有70%的信息是通過非言語渠道傳遞的,這壹點在性生活中表現得尤爲明顯,女性更是如此。由于女人天性中存有的溫情細膩,使她們對于內心的激情通過壹些動作表情隱喻出來。如果丈夫不善于從許多細微征兆中捕捉妻子內心激情的蛛絲馬迹,或者對此茫然無知,就會破壞雙方性愛之美感,埋下性生活不協調的隱患。這就要求我們在夫妻生活中,要學會接受來自對方的性暗示,即動作語言的交流。http://www.goldecb.com/gold-trend.html

還有壹例,新婚的蘇女士總被上司無端教訓,每次回家的時候,心情總沮喪到極點。丈夫看到她的這副神情,壹邊緊緊地擁著她,壹邊用手輕輕撫摸著她的秀發、臉頰、耳根、脖頸,蘇女士徹底放松四肢,任由丈夫愛撫,直到在他的懷裏發出甜美而均勻的呼聲。很多夫妻都認爲,溫柔愛撫之後,必然會有壹場激情的性愛。其實情況並不總是這樣。有時候夫妻中的壹方情緒不佳,性對于這種緊張狀態根本不起作用。盡管他(她)特別渴望被緊緊地擁抱、親切地愛撫,但這種體語傳遞的僅僅是壹種性愛行爲,而非有“回應”的准備性生活。因此,蘇女士需要的是丈夫緊緊地貼著她,不需要性的“回應”。

所以,非言語交流更勝壹籌。同濟大學性心理專家朱榮申教授指出,性生活中的非言語交流,可使性生活更富有想象力、感染力,給人以含蓄美的享受。非語言交流,是壹種無聲的信息傳遞,它借助于觸覺、嗅覺、視覺和聽覺以及身體的動作、姿勢等來表達感情和願望。

讓愛人讀懂妳的愛,還必須明白,愛是講緣分的。妳們的相識與相聚是壹種緣,而妳們的情能到幾分,有時並不是妳主觀努力可以決定的。妳的“愛”中有瑕疵嗎?只有妳自己知道。壹種“說也說不清楚的愛”,壹種“糊裏糊塗的愛”,有時或許倒是純真的愛。就怕妳的“愛”是壹種能說清楚的“有瑕”之愛。當“愛”成爲壹種感情交易時,妳壹定會爲妳“付出了那麽多”而痛苦。

“愛”的確是需要讀懂的。能讀懂妳的人才是知妳心的人,讀懂了妳並接受了妳的人,才是真正適合妳的人。人們常說“物以類聚”,“類”在這裏指的是內心溝通的壹個層面,達到了這個層面,妳們是同“類”。于是,妳們相愛了。這是因爲妳們相互了解更相互理解,相互愛慕更相互尊重,相互關懷更相互奉獻。

愛可以不需要理由,但相愛是壹定會有理由的。猶如壹年四季,播種愛情與農作壹樣,到什麽節氣忙什麽活兒,每壹個節氣都會收獲驚喜。不要搞混了四季變幻,錯把“春華”當“秋實”。急于收獲的心情壹定會夾雜苦楚,而過早摘下的果實壹定是青澀的。http://www.greenshop.hk/

猶如登山,愛在山巅。有情人在向愛進發的過程中,會讓腳印落在山間,要知道“到什麽山,看什麽景”,“紫藤花開在山腳,槐花白在半山腰,杜鵑花紅遍山頂”。每壹段高程都是有意義的,每壹段高程都會有幸福相伴。享受每壹段的過程,其實也是壹種美。戀愛之所以帶來無限的痛苦,是因爲自己已經迷失在登山的途中。錯把山腰當山頂,走進了山澗還誤以爲快到山巅。

生活裏,有很多的女人得不到男人的愛,是因爲她們始終讀不懂自己的男人。經驗告訴我們,女人不要經常去試探男人,更不要以分手作爲威脅,當妳經常給他這種心理暗示,他的潛意識就會做好分手的打算。試探就是不信任,不信任還用分手威脅就更不對了,反而讓男人懷疑妳的對他的愛。當男人真說同意的時候,妳不是雞飛蛋打了。

女人們,不要因爲男人愛妳就無限制的擴張自己的權利,不要幹涉他的理想、信仰和追求,不要自以爲妳比男人看的更遠,他壹定有些特質是妳所不了解的。有時候感情的本質就是交易,男人用他的愛來交換妳的愛,而不是換來妳的變本加厲。如果妳錯誤的認爲男人的退讓是對妳的敬畏,那妳的感情離死不遠了。

女人們,不要信奉這句話“妳愛我,妳就應該知道我想什麽”,這完全是壹句鬼話,沒有人會完全知道對方想什麽。由于男人沒有及時了解到妳的想法,而得出男人不愛妳的結論是非常愚蠢的。這句話在韓劇和言情小說裏經常見到。

女人們,不要因爲他是妳最親近的人,就可以向他傾訴壹切,妳的不幸、痛苦、委屈和牢騷都給他,將他做壹個出氣口,男人不是廢品收購站,當他確認他無法改變妳的時候,他就只有逃離。偶爾述說妳的不幸,會得到內心的宣泄也會得到男人的同情。但是多愁善感爲不壹定發生的事情擔心和傷感就會讓男人很反感。壹個經常笑的伴侶和壹臉倒黴相的伴侶,妳會選哪個?

女人們,不要對自己的魅力過分自信,沒有幾個男人會永久的承受出爾反爾,沒有幾個男人可以招之即來揮之即去,除非,這個男人愛妳別有動機。這樣很危險,男人不會本質上喜歡這樣做的,除非他在委屈自己討好妳。妳要是騙了他,就得注意他的杯子裏裝硫酸了沒有。http://www.allstar-design.com/

女人們,不要用這樣的思路來指導妳們的愛情——在男人的言行中尋找他不愛妳的證據。男人不能每時每刻將精力放在女人身上,他不可能注意到女人的每次暗示和不快。當妳用放大鏡來尋找灰塵的時候,總會找得到,這樣做,只是在指導男人告訴他如何不愛妳。男人喜歡女人記著他的好,而不是他的錯。他的愛得到肯定就會更愛,沒聽說那個男人越被指責越愛妳的。

女人們,男人和妳再親密,也不要隨便傷害他的自尊,不論是在別人面前還是獨處,傷害就是傷害,不論他是否愛妳。和上面說的壹樣,越肯定越愛。驢子的毛要順著捋。女人們,妳記住了嗎?毫無置疑,這對男人們同樣適用。  
category日記  time16:38  authorcupwater 
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Erotic Massage Salon Kiev wrote:

2019-08-05 time03:14

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